Are you raising small children? When your child makes a mistake, how do you handle it? Should I punish the child or slowly explain it to him? To know how to teach children scientifically and most effectively, please follow the important information in the following article.
Children are often hyperactive and naive, so they inevitably make mistakes in life. At that time, with a temper, most parents will punish the child or use spanking to threaten. The goal is to help the child not make the same mistake again next time. However, is this the most effective solution? If you want to know the answer, follow the information below.
What is punishment?
Punishment is a form of intervention with spanking or punishment when the child commits a mistake. Punishment action mainly comes from the impatient and angry mentality of parents when they see children making mistakes. However, this solution will help you clear your mind and immediately fix your baby's mistakes. But in the long run, it has the exact opposite effect.
Especially, it will make children more negative and self-deprecating.
Using punishment will make children more self-deprecating and taciturn
To make it easier to understand the concept of punishment, we will illustrate with a typical example:
Examples of punishment:
When children throw toys indiscriminately, parents will scold and hit them. Accompanied by a threat of how to beat the next time if the offense is repeated.
How do you think your child will react when faced with this situation? Of course, with fear because of the whipping, the child will pick up the toys and put them in the designated place at the request of their parents. It was an immediate reaction to fear of punishment. But in fact, the baby does not understand that leaving toys indiscriminately is not a right action. Therefore, the next time there is a high chance that the child will easily re-offend, and even have an anti-retaliation mentality . And you have to constantly spank, threaten, and even encourage your child so that he doesn't do it again.
Thus, indeed, using punishment does not help children get better, but only makes them more self-deprecating and completely counterproductive.
What is discipline?
Discipline is teaching children new skills, helping them manage their behavior and know how to behave more positively.
Examples of such discipline are:
When the child is dirty, you will not hit the child but explain to him that the action is not appropriate. Hands and feet, clothes will be dirty and mom has to do laundry like?
In addition, if the child throws things on the ground, instead of scolding the bad child and hitting the child's hand. Then with discipline you will ask the child to pick up the things. At the same time, explain to your child that throwing things will damage things and cause the floor to break quickly. Then keep things out of your baby's reach for days to come.
Teaching children with discipline helps them understand the core of the problem and have a more positive mentality
In this way, the child is not under the psychological pressure of being afraid of spanking. On the contrary, children will understand that doing it is not right and will bring consequences. Damaged the floor, causing mom to lose her laundry. From then on next time the child remembers and does not make mistakes again.
Thus, instead of using a quick and immediate punishment, it does not completely solve the problem. Then teaching children to follow discipline will be much more effective. Especially helping children learn from experience and great lessons after mistakes. In addition, discipline also helps to nurture the affection between the child and the parents to increase the attachment and closeness. Thus, later when there is anything, it is easier for the baby to share.
Parents should teach their children discipline instead of punishment
We adults often have the habit of using scary images to scare children. Like ghosts, if fathers are damaged or damaged, parents will not love them anymore. These ways have not brought about positive effects, but only made the already afraid child even more afraid. For young children, fear will lead to low self-esteem, making them less confident when they are born and greatly affect their success later.
Therefore, instead of using punishment, parents should apply discipline to teach their children. Although it takes more time to explain, the effect is much better.
Especially, he still understands that he is a good child, only his actions are wrong. And the child will change to correct that wrong action.
Teaching children with discipline will help nurture the bond between children and parents
In contrast, when being punished, children often have a disobedient mentality, sometimes children easily vent their anger on objects. In addition, after each punishment, the child will understand that he has "paid the price" for his wrong actions. And of course re-offend the next time.
On the other hand, psychological studies of young children also show that children who are spanked a lot have less self-control than children who are not punished. At the same time, this practice makes the child think that the parents are showing love through violence. Moreover, the child cannot understand the core reason for being punished. Therefore, more and more children avoid punishment, instead of actively changing themselves. Gradually, the distance between the child and the parents is also becoming more distant.
At a time when the punishments are no longer effective, children become resistant, then all measures fall into a dead end.
Therefore, in order for your baby to be better and develop the best, parents should apply discipline from an early age. At the same time, teach children to master their emotions in life to actively change themselves because of the love and expectations from their parents instead of fear and inferiority.